Empires of Ashes

"I swear something moved"

*A smile spreads across ket's face* "They are the very best at what they do."

"oh wonderful"

*he takes his shield from where it is leaning against the parapet, and lifts it, turning it left and right so it catches the sunlight, flashing out to his men, in response, the main column, and the cavalry flash their shields back, and out of the desert around them comes smaller flashes from all throughout the dunes, at least a hundred men hidden, flashing their swords back*

"Ah."

Ket: "Frontal assaults are not our only strength, the desert is our greatest ally."

"You say that like its not obvious"

"I Do like my drama."

"I noticed" *chuckles*

"What is life without showmanship?"

*eye roll*

OOC: So, here is a fun story:
During the munar landing, some guys involved in the program, hid a tiny(thumbnail sized) silicon wafer on the lander that would remain on the moon. It was etched with various pieces of art, and is currently the only known human art museum outside of earth....
One of the guys left his signature, made from his initials, on its corner. It is a stylized W with a line drawn in it for an A. .....It looks like a dick...

The first and only known human art museum in space, features a dick pic....

"The great philosopher ya'trima once said "what is theatre but life, without the boring bits?" *he grins*

"Trying to look clever infront of me, ket? you don't have to show off" *also grins*

"thats not showing off, just a damned good quote"

"Riiiight"

*smirks, then mumbles to himself* "let's see you fight me now uncle..."

"Confident eh?"

Semi-IC: *And then the Kelthrovi unleashed giant sand worms...dune worms...erm idk*

OOC GRABOIDS

OOC: That sounds like an STD.
"I'm sorry sir, but you have...Graboids!"

Ket: "with nine hundred immortals? I am quite confident indeed."

OOC: So Battlefield 1, St Quentin's Scar, Operations.

We push the enemy all the way back to the last 2 flags. With 300 lives and 2 airships I'm confident.
2 airships and 300 lives later, I'' pretty sure I always have a team of retards.

"I'm sure you are"
OOC damn...

OOC: I am now beyond anger.
The enemy just punched through us flawlessly
Seriously my team are brain dead.
I SINGLEHANDEDLY DESTROYED THREE ENEMY TANKS BY MYSELF USING THE WORSt TANK IN THE GAME(Mk V. I love the thing but if you're solo it's bad)
MY SQUAD IGNORED ME. YOU KNOW THE GUY IN THE 5 MAN TANK WHICH CAN SINGLEHANDEDLY HALT THE ENEMY ADVANCE WITH RAW FIREPOWER. BUT NO. THEY REFUSE TO GET IN UNTIL I'M NOT IN THE DRIVERS SEAT COS I'M ACTUALLY SHOOTING THE ENEMY TANKS.
AND THEN, ALL 4 OF THE CUNTS GET IN, DO NOTHING, AND NEARLY GET IT DESTROYED. BAILING OUT WHEN ITS ON 20hp. LEAVING ME TO GET THE FUCKING TANK SAFETY ONLY TO DIE DUE TO MORTAR SPAMMING CUNTS.

Yeah......I don't like having retarded teammates.
I get that the Mk 5 is considered awful(Driver gets either an MG or a Tank-Gewehr, only passengers get the 6-pounder guns) but I love the thing because I'm rather good in it.
I get that it's not the 1 man god machine that the FT-17 apparently is.
I know it's not the A7V, the most popular tank in the game because the driver gets a tank gun.
But it's no excuse for leaving the great big beautiful tank to die because of you get in *gasp* you get a fuck off huge tank gun. 2 of them.

OOC: Autocorrect deactivated when I type in caps.

OOC Ebony tanks you say XD

OOC: *Goes to make himself scrambled egg and spaghetti-Os on toast for breakfast. You're probably wondering why spaghetti-Os. Well I'm not allowed to eat beans, we only have 1 tin left and my sister tends to eat beans for dinner. I also am not allowed to eat the only cereal I like. Reason? Cos we have other cereal that hasn't been eaten. Even though I consider the rest to be awful, meaning I rarely eat cereal.
So I get the frying pan ready, my two END SLICES of toast (we're low on bread) are in the toaster.
WHY ARE YOU EATING DINNER FOR BREAKFAST?!
What?
WHY ARE YOU EATING SPAGETTHU FIR BREAKFAST.
if you actually look you'll see eggs and toast.
WE HAVE $60 TO LAST UNTIL NEXT WEEK!
I didn't know
SO DON'T EAT ANYTHING WE COULD HAVE AS A MEAL.

What I didn't say:
Yes we have no money cos although you 'work' you're only pulling in your minimum monthly wage.
You actively go outside and sit in your truck on your fucking phone with the engine idling. BURNING FUEL.
You actively carry on buying cigarettes even though you have a vape thing and know we're on a budget.
We have enough money to buy the neccesities but you're just sitting there on your fucking phone.
I actively restrict what I FUCKING eat, unlike everyone else because I'M the one who'll get punished.
The moment I do anything you don't like you flip your shut.
IT IS YOUR FUCKING FAULT I CANNOT GET FURTHER EDUCATION OR A JOB
YOUR FUCKING FAULT WE'RE IN THIS FUCKING COUNTRY.
AND UOU CANT EVEN BE BOTHERRD TO GET UP OFF YOUR FAT ARSE AND ACTUALLY SIGN THE GOD DAMN PAPERWORK TO MAKE ALL OF OUR LIVES EASIER
NO YOU'D RATHER SIT ON YOUR ARSE AND THROW MONEY ARE YOUR SHITTY LITTKE MARBEL HEROES GAME BECAUSE YOU'RE A LAZY CUNT.

Sorry......day isn't going well.
My insomnia is getting worse, Mum n Jay are arguing almost daily (cos of me 'not doing anything' cos you know IT IS ILLEGAL FOR ME TO WORK)

OOC hey matt.....I might have found a movie that i think I can class as racist against british
its not exactly a new film or a new thing, but i only just found out how bad it is

OOC:?

OOC 'the patriot'
you know that mel gibson film
where the british commit an atrocity that IRL was infact committed by the FUCKING NAZIS

OOC: Okay...

OOC specifically, rounding up a whole town's worth of people into the town church, locking them in, and then burning it down
also the film fucking lies about the cause of the war
demonises the British as murderers of civilians and children while the Americans would never do that
completely ignores that 2/3 of Americans were AGAINST independence and fought with the British
Makes it look like the British were fucking kidnapping the Americans' coloured 'servants' to serve in their army, when IRL those slaves fucking deserted to join the British to earn their freedom
and then presents the Americans' promise of freedom to the slaves who served in the army as fucking noble and grand, when it was actually a terrified reaction to the fact the British had promised the exact same thing
and....and.....oop, i think I just broke something in my brain from anger

OOC: Wow....

OOC I mean.....you get BULLSHIT like that....and yeah you may think 'oh its just a film so what'
but then you get films like 'we were soldiers' 'zulu' and 'waterloo' that are REALLY good films, and yet still mostly true to the real fucking events!
Hell, even historical films which aren't based on actual events like Master and Commander get so much of their shit right in terms of how shit was.....and then you get this FUCKING TRIPE

OOC: It is Mel Gibson.

OOC yeah but he's just an actor in it, not writer or director

Ket: "this is the best fighting force ever assembled Trajan. A dracian legion and the kelthrovi immortals..."

"Lets hope its enough eh?"

"For the sake of the continent."

"Indeed"

Ket: "a lot of weight upon our shoulders these next few weeks and months, Trajan."

"That much I noticed unfortunatly"

Ket: "you said you wanted to live up to your ancestors? How does saving dracia, and every other nation on the Phoenix isle sound?"

"sounds like it'd do"

Ket: "glad to hear it, I need you committed to the course."

*One of the new immortals approaches, climbing the stairs to the battlements. he appears to be one of the 'scout' immortals, his armour brushed, not polished, and his armour's joints are wrapped with cloth. Over his shoulders is a cloak made of a mottled sandy cloth. He speaks in Kelthrovi* "General, Kelthrovi scouts have been spotted in the dune sea, to the southeast."

Ket: "Hmmm... How many?"

Scout: "A hundred, perhaps. maybe more. spread out across the sands."

"Hm. i'll have my auxila deployed to help deal with them, Ket."

Scout: "This is the dracian you spoke of in your summons?"

Ket: "Yes. This is Praetor Trajan."