A slightly smaller Mess

*we actually doing it or are you skipping*

OOC: Dunno

Tyren: "I can't tell if you mean you expected more or less."

Akira: "There was literally bits falling off."

Emma: wait really?

Girl:... I can never go back. Never.

Akira: "Yeah the thing is what... at least like... 20 thousand years old?"

Tyren: "They would probably do much the same as they would have done to you had you stayed."

Girl: I know.

Emma:....huh

Akira: "Its a golden age hive ship."

Tyren: "I imagine i would be killed by the inquisition if i returned. After a lengthy interrogation as to the whereabouts of your mother."

Emma: I'm impressed what you did with the place.

Girl: then what the fuck do I do now?

Tyren: "The same thing i will. Make some new life, whatever you want. Personally... I just don't want to fight anymore."

Akira: "Still needs work. The engine deck is a radioactive wasteland."

Girl: where?! Where the fuck would accept me?!

Emma: oh. not good.

Tyren: "I'm seven foot tall and black as the ace of spades." *he chuckles* "You'll have an easier time than me."

Akira: "Yeaaaaah kinda need the engines to... yknow. move."

Max: Which was the initial reason we became pirates

Emma: ah.

the girl clearly didn't find that amusing

Tyren: "look, i'm not saying that it will be easy. But you have every opportunity in the world. Choose what you want to be, and you can be it."

Akira: "We needed the parts to fix the old girl."

"... I would have thought an astartes of all people would get it"

Emma: guessin you're a lot closer now?

Tyren: "You still have the fire in you huh? Want to fight?"

Akira: "Much closer than we were"

Girl:....How can I possibly do anything else when all I've known is being a soldier?

Emma: fair enough.

Tyren: "Being a soldier brings a lot of skills. Transferable skills."

Girl: .... you don't get it

Tyren: "I do. its hard to adapt to civilian life."

she's looking at the helmet again

*he sighs* "You'll find something."

she doesn't reply

"...Do you dream about it?... The killing?"

"Depends"

"Do you only see it after a battle, i knew people like that once."

"Sometimes"

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No"

"I get it. We've all done some bad things... I've been around long enough to do some... *Shakes his head* Not going to lie, pretty terrible things."

*silence*

"I must've killed hundreds of people at the gates of cadia."

"It's war"

"A thousand year old astartes champion fighting chaos cultists isn't war. Its a slaughter."

"War by any other name"

*he shakes his head* "They sent them to tire me, nothing more."

"....smart tactic"

"I was the only astartes in that Kasr. Just guardsmen behind me."

"still smart."

"I know. Doubly so... Then they came. Once brother astartes, driven mad by the nails and the warp."

"World eaters?"

"...Yes. Sixteen of them."

"Ah..."

"I stood alone in a gap in the rockcrete wall 6 foot wide. Storm Shield and hammer, in cataphractii armour. Behind me were a group of guardsmen, half as many standing as wounded. I fought them off as best i could. I killed eleven of them before one put his blade through my shoulder."

she's listening

"I put my hammer through his skull, but the blade had cut through almost all the muscle in my left shoulder. I locked my armour, with my shield up, but without the ability to move it i didn't last much longer."

*still listening*

"...Long story short. I lasted another ten minutes. I didn't manage to kill anymore of them, and they pulled me down. And tore me apart."

"...and you survived?"

"Barely. One of them carried on to butcher the guardsmen, while the other three started to cut me apart... So i pulled the pins on the last few of my grenades. I didn't want them to take me alive."

"oh..."